Haha, Silly Girls. I Will End You.

Today was rough. We decided to completely change the layout of the lingerie area, and everything was like, "I don't want to go there, so I'm gonna break and throw bras all over the floor" and everyone was like, "Oh snap, bras on the floor, what should we do about that?"

Answer?

PICK THEM UP. DON'T JUST LOOK AT THEM CONFUSEDLY.

THAT HELPS NO ONE.

But yeah, anyways. Everyone and everything was like, being insane.

So when a bunch of prostitots showed up, (YES, I SAID PROSTITOTS. LIKE BABY PROSTITUTES, LIKE BROOKE SHIELDS IN "PRETTY BABY") and they were all like, "OH MY GOD, DID YOU KNOW MY BOOBS ARE LIKE, A 36 D? OH MY GOD, ISN'T THAT AWESOME, THEY'RE SO BIG." I was like, NO SHUT UP.

So I looked over, and this girl was seriously a B cup at most.

And she was wearing a push up bra.

Don't try to lie to me, I know my stuff.

So that gave me a good laugh in the midst of all the craziness.

(oYo)
Booblogger

Wearing the Right Size Bra

Myth:
Wearing the right size bra can make you look smaller/larger.
Reality:
NO.
Whoever said this, stop right now.

The only reason your boobs would look smaller is because you wouldn't be trying to shove them into tiny ass bras, making the look like a multiplying cells of breast tissue.
Because you would stop saying, oh, I'm not a D cup, I've never been a D cup, and I'll never be a D cup, even if radiation started making my breasts swell as large as my head!
WELL GUESS WHAT, DENYING DANA?
YOU'RE A D. THAT'S A CUP SIZE, AND YOU'RE IT.
AND 40? THAT'S A NUMBER. UNLESS YOU LIKE ROLLING HILLS OF BACK FAT, YOU NEED TO WEAR IT.
Theoretically, not all of you denying Dana's are D cups or 40 bands, but you're not wearing the right one.

And they would only look larger because the wouldn't fill your cup only halfway, leaving the top empty, and the cup wrinkly, and your boobs looking like they're drowning raisins.
If you're a B cup, guess what?
YOU'RE A B.
NOT A C, OR A D, OR A DD.
B.

All wearing the right size bra is going to do for you, is make your boobs look the way they're supposed to.
The way genetics and Mother Nature, and all those fun bits of your life intended them to look.
You want to look bigger?
BUY A PUSH UP BRA.
Want to look smaller?
BUY A MINIMIZER.

But whatever you want, STOP LYING.
Because, in the dark of the night, I will find you.
(Anastasia tie in, high five!)
And I will tie you up with measuring tapes, and suspend you over a burning pile of your old, ill fitting bras, and poke you with the burning hot metal bits of the bras until you see the grievous errors of your ways.

(OYO)
Rasputin
I mean
Booblogger