A Short Story About How My Christmas Was More Awesome Than Yours

Here's to hoping everyone had a great holiday season and New Year!

So, I have this friend, and she's basically awesome.

She's gorgeous and Asian, and just basically cooler than some (most/all) of your friends.

(No offense, it's just how it is.)

Anyways, she likes my blog, and knows how much I like boobs, so she basically gave me the awesomest asssortment of presents ever.

Think...

Hello kitty meets drinking meets boobs.

(New Year's theme anyone?)

I got:

A snazzy Hello Kitty key cover

Two, count 'em, two Hello Titty shot glasses

A box of gummy boobies, which were basically pretty yummy

A booby fishing lure

A drinking dice game

A drinking card game 

And here's a picture, in case you have a hard time imagining such awesomeness.

I love her, it's like she can read my mind.

That's all I have right now lovelies, but keep an eye out for more later.

And try not to beat yourselves up because my friends are more awesome than yours.

It happens!

That's right, I can hold shot glasses with my boobs.

(oYo)

Booblogger

Manboobs, Worth Murdering Over?

Now look. I love teasing people about their manboobs as much as the next person.

It can't be helped! 

But we all need to be more careful about who we're teasing. 

Otherwise, someone like this may kill you.

Picture from bbc.co.uk

This is Gary Brown.

And he was recently arrested for beating his neighbor with a chair leg for teasing him about his manboobs.

"During his trial, Brown said he had been drinking with Mr. Berwick when his friend began laughing at him and insulting his mother.

The scuffle began after Mr. Berwick mocked Brown's "man boobs", the defendant, who handed himself in to police, told Chelmsford Crown Court."

"I asked him to leave but he didn't. He kept laughing and got up and had this shot glass in his hand and he went for me with it. I hit him about three times. I remember hitting him and that's it."

Mr. Berwick is said to have sustained a severe head injury, 25 fractures to his ribs, a broken breast bone,  a broken arm, a broken jaw, and a broken finger. Mr. Brown will serve a minimum sentence of 14 and a half years in jail.

I am somehow reminded of the guy who was found wearing a bra, and standing over a dead goat.

So, the lesson here is don't get drunk with your neighbors and say things about their mothers/manboobs.

Be careful, it's a dangerous place out there.

(oYo)

Booblogger